Baseball in de Park, by Arthur Guiterman

Baseball in de Park

The Captain of the Neversweats was rooted in his place,
One foot upon the tattered coat that served for second base;
His ashen-hued habiliments were padded, hip and knee
(The Captain of the Neversweats was all of three-foot-three);
A mighty mitt incased his paw; he spat upon the same
And chirped with shouted interludes, the Story of the Game:   "'Twas Sattid'y, a week ago, we played de Busy Bees;
Dey rung a borrered pitcher in, an' say! He wuz de cheese!
De way he handed pretzels out wuz putty near a crime;
He chucked dis curly inshoot-drop dat fools ye ev'ry time.
He'd held us down to forty hits, an' t'ings wuz lookin' blue,
Fer dey had fifty-seven runs, while we had t'irty-two.
He'd held us down to forty hits, an' runs wuz mighty rare;
But in de nint' we sized 'im up an' pasted 'im fer fair.   "Foist, Dumpy Collins found his coives an' knocked a corkin' fly;
Den Limpy picked a crackerjack an' smashed it in de eye;
Den Skeezicks hit de ball a swipe dat lifted off de lid;
An' Carrots ran de bags fer home, an' cricky! How he slid!
Dem Bees wuz stiffs! Dey couldn't t'row, dey couldn't ketch at all,
While we wuz playin' fer our lives--we couldn't miss de ball.   "An' did we win? Well, did we! Say! Dey didn't git a smell.
We chased each udder roun' de bags--'twuz like de carrousel.
Why, w'en we put de las' man out an' added up de score
Dey hadn't only eighty runs, an' we had ninety-four!
What! Lick dese lobsters? Sure we kin, at any time o' year!
Jes' watch; we'll show ye how it's done. Hi, Cully! Put 'er here!"

poems.one - Arthur Guiterman

Arthur Guiterman